I remember / je me souviens
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For those limbic bursts of nostalgia, invented by Proust, miniaturized by Nicholson Baker, and freeze-dried by Joe Brainard in his I remember and by Georges Perec in his Je me souviens.

But there are no fractions, the world is an integer
Like us, and like us it can neither stand wholly apart nor disappear.
When one is young it seems like a very strange and safe place,
But now that I have changed it feels merely odd, cold
And full of interest.
          --John Ashbery, "A Wave"

Sometimes I sense that to put real confidence in my memory I have to get to the end of all rememberings. That seems to say that I forego remembering. And now that strikes me as an accurate description of what it is to have confidence in one's memory.
          --Stanley Cavell, The Claim of Reason


Friday, February 20, 2004
I remember that after my parents bought 7-F and while they were remodelling it I would run like a maniac through the empty and tarped rooms, sprinting through the apartment with pure glee. Sometimes Tommy and Ken would do this with me as well. I can't believe how much fun that was! And now, remembering this, I can measure the change in myself over time, remembering how different my attitude to the empty place was when my parents moved out of 7-F about fourteen years later.

I remember that there was a toddler who lived above us, and whenever he went running around upstairs, the chandelier would shake and tinkle in the most annoying way. I think of this as happening for years, but of course the toddler was only a toddler for a little while. I don't recall ever being annoyed by any other noise there. But my mother wouldn't allow me to play the piano after nine -- this was one of those rules of etiquette that it became clear all adults knew. It also meant that if I stalled, I could avoid practicing.

I remember my mother considered renting a piano, but then bought one -- an upright. I remember that the B above middle C made a distinctive, untuned, rasping sound.

I remember their moving the chandelier from 2-G to 7-F and my surprise that fixtures could be moved. This seemed a category mistake.


posted by william 11:49 PM
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